coolhipfrank

little update

2008-09-23T00:34:00.002-05:00

Every now and then I daydream about things I would love to have/do. I don't always get what I want.

This time I did.

I just accepted an awesome job! I'm going to start working at the central library downtown!!!!

Fancy!

hehe.

2008-08-21T16:22:00.000-05:00

Scene
[The usually slutty-dressed daughter walks into the kitchen in a modest school uniform]

Dad: Why are you dressed like a nun?
Daughter: I thought I was dressing nice.
Dad: Since when?

[They argue; the mom joins]

Mom: Are you having sex?
Dad: You're having sex?!
Daughter: How would you know if I'm having sex? Only I would know that...

[pulls hair pin out and tosses her hair]

Daughter:.. and my lover!

[Frank spits soda on his laptop and dies of laughter. The Family Channel rules.]

from Apple to Microsoft

2008-08-20T16:28:00.002-05:00

I've had an ipod for years but since it broke, I have had to move on and find another mp3 player. So I chose the Zune.

It has everything that an ipod has. Plus, it has a radio. It has wireless capabilities. And it's non-pretentious. Then why am I so sad?

Ipods have a neat looking and functioning program called Itunes. Zunes have this crappy java looking program called.. it doesn't even has a cool name. ARGH!

We'll see how this pans out in the long-term.

woot

2008-08-15T18:51:00.000-05:00

Went to a 2nd job interview today. So excited. Yay! Say a prayer.

lastest crush

2008-08-14T16:40:00.002-05:00

Hey you guys,

If I uprooted my whole life to move to Massachusetts to marry Seth Rogen, would you guys come? I need the support of my friends! And I would totally do it for you, I promise.

the new job search

2008-08-14T16:01:00.002-05:00

It seems that every time I have to start the search for the new job, I get super anxious. I get in crazy Frank mode. It's not remotely cute. So to my surprise, I'm shocked that this time around I'm actually excited and happy about the whole thing.

I guess it can be because I'm finally out of a job that I really hated. I didn't even realize how much I hated it till I was out of it. Wow. Huge weight off my shoulders.

Another thing is that I probably had the BEST summer in my life. I quit Borders, then on a whim, I go to camp with Devon. It not only made me feel good about myself, but it made me realize that I can do a whole lot more for the world that what I was doing previously. I can make a difference in someone's life. I can be important and be proud of it. I really hope I can make out there again next summer. Perhaps for a week or two at least.

I think the last reason why I'm so optimistic is that I'm putting my foot down and actually applying for jobs that I like and taking my time with it. Doing everything right. I don't apply for the job I know I'm gonna hate.

I'm a little bit older this time and a little bit smarter, I suppose.

oh yeah

2008-08-11T18:12:00.002-05:00

I haven't posted in a LONG while, but I promise I'll start. The first few posts will probably be crap, but I'll get used to it.

posting... as promised

2008-02-14T03:25:00.001-06:00

Watching my girl, Amy Winehouse win 5 Grammys the other day put me in a mood. She wasn't even allowed to go to the US to accept her winnings in person. Meanwhile all these other triffling hoes show up at the Grammys. Let's take a closer look at the red carpeters.

ROLL CALL, BITCHES!

First of all we have Alicia Keys. I guess she did win something, so I can't say too much about her.

Next up we have the Beyonce. Not showing her armpits for once. You know her mom made her dress, right? sighs. I only have one problem. Just because you have a song about it doesn't mean you have to style everything you wear "to the left." bitch.

Her left, not your left!! Like your left matters to Beyonce! SPOTLIGHT!!!!

Lets take a look at Brooke Hogan. Not because she's popular or anything. Just because she reminds us of someone who performs at the Rose Room at S4. Beauty Tip #1 --

Poor Fergie-Ferg

And the "just about as tragic" Miley Cyrus.

Okay so we have Nelly Furtado. Now I don't care that her hair is a mess. I don't care that her dress looks like the Statue of Liberty after seven tequila shots or even the fact that she has the "I'm having a baby" belly rub pose... but...

Finally we have Rihanna. She's conquered the straights with her smoking hot bod. Seduced the gay mens with ballet in the rain. Now she's doing the lesbians with her new hair!!!

Rihanna = Jesus

Uncle Frank!

2008-01-11T17:11:00.000-06:00

Check out my new niece about to make her world debut in about 3 months!

It's Phoenix Evangeline! No seriously! That's gonna be her name. I think I'll call her Eva, for short.

w00t

MRI drama

2008-01-08T12:14:00.000-06:00

So I just came back from getting an MRI. I've never had one, but I thought it was at least similar to an X-ray. And boy was I wrong.

They strap you down on a bed table and tell you not to move through the whole thing or it has to be done again. The total time is 30 minutes. They press a button, you slide into a giant circle thingy. It's a very enclosed space. You can lick the ceiling of it, if you wanted to. hehe. So then, the doctor goes out of the room and it starts.

The only way I can describe it is if you seen the movie The Exorcist when Linda Blair is strapped down at that mental hospital. And there's this awful banging sounds of some machine... yeah, that is what an MRI sounds like! I was freaking out.. and trying not to move.

Complete Hell for 30 minutes. At one point I was actually counting the seconds, trying to distract myself from the horrible noises. I counted up to 10 minutes and 37 seconds. My limbs were falling asleep, I couldn't stop from breathing so rapidly, and I totally had an itch!!!

And then sometimes the machine would stop, and you would get your hopes up thinking that it's over but it would start up again! Start up again... with a different sound. If you ever got used to one sound, another dissonant one was around the corner.

ARRRGH!

jeez

2008-01-05T15:32:00.000-06:00

Today is a milestone-esque day for me.

Why am I so sad?

so cold

2008-01-04T10:04:00.000-06:00

It's too cold! And boring.

So Jason has recommended that I take up video games. I don't know about that. Let's see what the internet has so say about them...

dude.

2008-01-02T23:09:00.000-06:00

Just a little update. I have already been yelled at for not posting religiously, so I guess I'll start now. Here are a few things just to get you people up to speed on my life:

1) Frank's Home Life: I have so much time on my hands (see: work life). The internet has lost pretty much all of its sparkle to me. I feel like that robot, Johnny Five... I need input!

In other home news, OMG you guys! I'm sure that Jason will have a drama-infused blog about it very soon though. We had/have/seriously had a mouse in the condo! Usually only Amanda Bynes, Gay Cowboys, or a combination of the two can make Jason turn into a 11-and-a-half year old tween. teehee.

2) Frank's Work Life: As some of you know, I was in a work-related injury a while back. Well not much as change. I'm still not allowed back at work till I get the okay from my doctor. The good news is that the insurance people finally accepted my claim. Jeez, it took them 3 weeks! Hopefully I'll get back at work by the 9th of January, which is awesome cause I'm getting insanely bored at home all day. It's so not as much fun as you would think.

Yeah, so this little "break" from work as sorta gave me the courage to finally get off my ass and start thinking of what I really want to do. Rough draft plans are being sorted out, and I'll key you guys in when I make decisions in ink.

3) Frank's Romantic Life: Oh man, I have been playing it safe for a few years now. Every date I went on I've had my guard up. I have met a special person that has seen through all the BS I shell out. We are actually creeping up on that "One-Year" mark in the relationship. Naturally I'm completely freaked out about it, but I think things are going to go well.

I haven't really integrated him into my life completely, even though we have been together for so long. I guess I'm still trying to keep my defenses up just a little while longer. If you know me well, you know I don't mix my romantic stuff with my friends, family or work very often. I feel more comfortable with all them separated.

I guess that is one thing. I like to keep them separated, and he likes them all mixed. I think in the end it's better to be a more fluid person that it is to be a compartmentalized one. I think he's good for me.

4) Frank's Friends Life: If everything else wasn't so organized by group, this one definitely is. It's been a long time since I've had this many groupings of friends in my life at one point. I have my inner friends, my college friends, my old work friends, my new work friends, my BFs old friends, my BFs new friends, and my "friends that are only friends cause they are insanely fun" friends.

Yeah, I really can't mix these people together. Last time I did that it was the Gingerbread fiasco of 06. Just because we ditched the party early, stole half of the gingerhouse and threw it at Borders while driving slightly intoxicated doesn't make it a bad time! Yeah, Devon still curses me for that party. Even though one year she totally broke a bottle of red wine on my kitchen floor! ARGH!

5) Frank's Family Life: I guess I can sum this up with everything is going alot better than it was earlier in the year. My sister has moved back to Texas from Florida. She's like 6 months pregnant, and living with my Mom. Yeah, they don't get along. You would think that both of their maternal instincts would kick in, but nothing. I'm hoping that it'll happen soon.

6) Frank's Life Life: My New Years resolutions this year have nothing to do with my love life or weight, which is so unlike me. It's mostly "be happy" type things. And I think I have much to be happy about this time around.

Well. Here I go. Onward to 2008!

art imitating life

2007-12-22T07:25:00.000-06:00

I saw Juno yesterday.

Seems kinda funny because of the whole Jamie Lynne Spears thing. Yeah, if you haven't had access to the internet in a while, Britney Spears' sister Jamie Lynne (age 16, has her own show on Nick) is prego!

JUNO SPOILER!

and just like in the movie, I hope Jamie Lynne gives it to Jennifer Garner! Awesome movie though. But there was too much Michael Cera in it. I mean, like as in too much skin. It kinda makes you feel like a creepy old man watching that movie. hehe. Otherwise good. And Jason Bateman needs to stop making movies. He's in too many things now! How am I supposed to type-cast him in my mind (which let's face it, is the only thing that matters) if he's playing different characters?! Argh.

ETA: Oh yeah, and for some reason there's a scene where Ellen Page is taking off her skirt while in the driver's seat in a van. Yeah, nothing to do with the plot just BAM! 16-year old prego taking off her skirt. Did I mention she wears jeans under the skirt anyways. very odd.

oh yeah

2007-12-14T11:43:00.000-06:00

I almost forgot I have a blog! hehe.

Anyways, I have been mad busy lately. It's the holidays, so work has been a complete madhouse. People are ruder and more entitled to be rude than ever.

On the bad side, I hurt my back at work. And yes, I'm seeing a chiropractor.

It's kind of weird. As everyone does, the only thing I know about them is what I see on TV. You know... bone cracking, hated my medical doctors, etc. So I am still alittle wary about the whole thing. Even more so because he is strongly suggesting I don't go to work for like a few weeks. I guess sometime like your back doesn't heal overnight, but I just am very anxious about how everything's gonna turn out.

Jeez, this sucks.

I can be mobile at certain times of the day, if I don't do specific things like kneel, bend, squat, run, jump, sit-up, sit-down, lay down, or skip. If I don't do any of those things, I can actually move around. (Although Jason has started making fun of the way I walk. HATE CRIME!) Bad thing is that once I do any of the mention things, I complete fold like a deck of cards and can't do anything. It sucks.

So Icy-Hot and various meds provided my many friends is keeping me from being bedridden (then slowly developing teleknesis, then killing everyone).

but I do like vistors and kind words of encouragement.

YAY!

2007-10-05T21:32:00.000-05:00

First picture of my new niece/nephew!

I present to you all, my sister Christina's fetus!

jealous?

2007-09-04T15:37:00.000-05:00

::clears throat::

Damn, I look good.

stupid question du jour

2007-08-23T15:01:00.000-05:00

Guy holds a calendar and looks confused. He is with this girl.

Frank: Are you doing alright, sir? (I call everyone 'sir' or 'miss.' Makes them feels good, therefore they are less likely to piss me off later)

Guy: Yeah... well... what's up with this calendar?

Looks at calendar.
Frank: Well it's just a 16-month calendar.

Guy: 16?

Frank: It's not 2008 yet, so they have included some extra months.

Guy: But how do you know which months are they?

Frank holds it all in... (calm, blue ocean... calm blue ocean)

Girl comes out of her ditzy haze: It's like September, October, November, December. Four extra months!

OMGosh!

I almost forgot.

2007-08-19T16:33:00.000-05:00

It's like my bday in 2 weeks!

What am I gonna do, you guys?!

the Internets are amusing

2007-08-07T00:51:00.000-05:00

How do people come up with this shit?! If the gays would put some of that creativity and thought to something else, they would rule the world. Instead they make this.

Planet Unicorn Episode 1

Add to My Profile | More Videos
Genius, loves it. There's more episodes!

Damn you Potter!

2007-07-20T13:46:00.001-05:00

Today is the day.

Worst than Christmas is what I like to call the day when the last Harry Potter book, Deathly Hallows, is released. Or should I say the day before it releases. I just came home from the madness. Luckily, I will not be in the belly of the devil (re: when the book is released at midnight) when hoards of people come into the store to purchase said book. I was only scheduled from 6am to 1pm. And let me tell you:

The fact that we open at 9am doesn't stop the crazies from lining up at the door at 6am for the Harry Potter book! I am wiping the sleep outta my eyes and there's some kids skipping around the front door with their wands and redbulls.

Damn you, kids.

The woes of being a bookseller.

Seven million people called today asking if they could get a book at midnight. NO! you can't, I almost did the evil laugh at the end when they called. But at least I can handle calls without stressing it. It is when the store opened at 9am, is when the customer service fun started.

Ways people tried to reserve their Harry Potter book at midnight:
1) Yea, my name is coughjefffranpetebobjoecough, I reserved a Harry Potter book for midnight exactly.

2) I ordered it at Barnes & Noble and they said that you guys would honor my reservation for midnight...

3) I did pre-order it!! [five minutes ago]

4) I called and they said they were holding it for me.

5) J K Rowling is my cousin.

6) I'll pay full price!

7) I want that book, dammit! [throws money at me]

8) [random high-pitched words in succession]

9) [chanting a spell at me]

10) I gonna stand here till I get a book!

Jeez, people!! This makes me wanna go to Borders at midnight, grab a book, and starting reading the last two paragraphs over the loud speaker, ruining the ending for everyone, then calling everyone whores!!!

Brunch!

2007-07-09T00:24:00.000-05:00

I don't usually blog about food, but damn.

Ciudad on Oak Lawn and Blackburn St rocked my socks off!

I totally rocked Dallas, brunch style!

Imagine an awesome selection of real Mexican food. None of this TexMex crap. I'm still drooling. Here's what I had:

Mimosas, of course. Can't rock brunch without the booze!

Ceviche - Gulf shrimp, scallops and octopus with vanilla pineapple pico de gallo

That's right kids! Did you really think that Mexicans eat tacos all day?! There are huge bodies of water on both sides of the country. No one does seafood like Mexicans! A few years ago, I had the privilege of tagging along a trip to Mexico beyond the touristy junk of what people want to see and experience. It has open my eyes to some great flavors a few including the seafood. I haven't found a good place that does it well until now! yay

So that including a free round of raspberry shots courtesy of the waitress, great food experience!

Go there!

whatever Dora!

2007-07-05T15:52:00.000-05:00

kinda odd.

shiiit!

2007-07-04T22:12:00.000-05:00

So there's some 7-11s that turned into Kwik-E-Marts!!! Someone go to the Kwik-E-Mart in Dallas!!!

Location in Dallas!

Take pictures with Apu!!

BookClub

2007-06-27T00:35:00.000-05:00

In the hopes to become more literary, I have joined a book club. You would think for someone who is in the vicinity he/she would know something about the subject matter, but not so much.

The peeps at work started a book club, or should I say the English teacher that works at Borders seasonally started one. Anywho, anyone can start one but I guess organized reading is just too much for the average person to put up with.

Cards were made. A sign-up sheet was posted. It is kind of neat actually, since Borders doesn't ever advertise anything but itself. (We would get random people asking to put up their poster to some obsure event. NO! Go away! But buy something on your way out!!) So it was fun hyping up our own event to our short-attention-span consumers.

We meet on the last Wednesday of each month at 7:30pm, and today is the first official meeting. So stoked. So not finished with the book yet!

The first book is Shalimar the Clown by Salman Rushdie. I have a few hours to kill when I get off of work tommorrow till the meeting, so I figure I can at least get somewhat aquainted with the book.

I'll tell you guys how it went soon. Perhaps I'll rally some friends to join if it doesn't suck. I don't see it being too horrible though. I mean even if 3 people show up and didn't read the book, there's always Plan B...

Did I mention that meetings are going to be held at The Uptown Pub?!

What? You didn't understand the matrilineal kinship analogyon chapter five?! Drink for slop!!

Buzz kill... quite literally

2007-06-26T00:21:00.000-05:00

I finally saw Waitress the other day. Everyone I know loved it, and I LOVED it too.

I was ranting to everyone at work about it the next day. Oooh, it was soo good. Funny, smart, filled with pie-euphemism-goodness.

Then today I found out that Adrienne Shelly, the writer/director/ and actress who stole every scene from Keri Russell (the main character) like died just before the movie was released in theaters!

GEEZ!

Good movie though. Sad. Good. AHH!

It seems like everytime you find a movie to talk about, it sucks... or someone gets murdered. j/k

RIP, though. WATCH THAT MOVIE!

wow

2007-06-21T18:09:00.000-05:00

I haven't blog in like forever! And I have sooo much to rant about. I'll get to it very soon. But here's a little something fun to tie you guys over till then.

Lifetips1
Uploaded by coolhipfrank

ugho

2007-06-03T03:33:00.000-05:00

Drinking makes you do stupid things.

AND things that you would never have the guts to do.

both can be good things.

blog

2007-05-15T21:31:00.000-05:00

So I'm actually enjoying Ryan Jenkins' blog. (Jenkins is a person I went to college with. We were in the marching band together. I was calm, cool and collective. He likes to tell the story of when he used Nair on his gentials. So, we're good friends.)

You guys to check it out. I know for those of you who know Ryan and me, this might come as a surprise. "What?! Frank?! Good. Ryan?!" you would think. But he has a good thing going on over at his blog.

Hehe, I remember one time when we were at a party getting drizzunk and I couldn't stop throwing various objects at Ryan yelling "You want attention?! I'll give you attention! Arrrggh!

ahh, memories.

media

2007-05-03T16:38:00.000-05:00

Wow I'm blog-crazy today. Yay for days off.

Well, I just finished watching the lastest episode of America's Next Top Model. And I'm disappointed, you guys. One of my favorites was eliminated, Brittany.

And she was horrible! Super bad! Observe.

Antm1
Uploaded by coolhipfrank

Bare with me! I'm still new at all this. The transition effects suck!

Sighs. Oh well, Jaslene for the win!

a brother story

2007-05-03T02:27:00.000-05:00

Interesting story.

My brother Stephan is obsessed with video games like any normal kid. He's in first grade and he beats me in every video game he bugs me to play with him.

He's a very smart kid. I don't think any of us could have half of his savvy at his age. And I truely believe that now that I heard this story about it.

You see, he doesn't do too well in school. What?! A smart kid doing poorly in school? It's madness, you exclaim! So knowing that he's such a smart kid, my Dad makes him a proposition:

Bring me ten As on your daily tests and I'll get you a new game.

Sound like a good deal? Or an impossible deal for a six-and-a-half year old?

Well let me tell you something. The first day, he brought home an A. The second day, another A. And so on. After the sixth ace, my Dad was anxious. Dad would go into a rant. Geez, I'm gonna have to buy him a game! Not only that, I'm probably going to have to buy him another game, after another ten As. I can just imagine the day he walks across that graduation stage at the University of Texas (sighs, hiss) after getting that first-round draft pick (ugh), after getting engaged to a nice Hispanic virgin (man, it goes on!), and after he opens up his very own Medrano & Sons Low-Riders Repairshop...
The first things he'll say to me is Where's my game?!!!

Positive Reinforcement is just a fancy phrase for Bribery.

So it eventually happened. The tenth A came. Dad reluctantly kept his end of the bargain and bought him a game.

On a later date, it was Parent-Teacher Night. Dad questioned, "How did Stephan get all these As on his tests?" And the teacher answered, "What? I don't know what you're talking about Mister Medrano" Dad was confused, "So all these As he bought home where fakes?" "Those are As, Mister Medrano, but they are from practice tests. I give them out everyday so the children can learn how to take tests. I don't test everyday. That would be excessive. The practice tests are even graded and corrected by the child himself. Didn't you notice the massive eraser marks? Or the red-crayoned A?"

I laughed my ass off after I heard that! Kudos to Stephan for following through with his web of lies! That's my brother!!!

question of the week

2007-05-01T18:22:00.000-05:00

It's the How I Met Your Mother question of the week, you guys!

Pay attention!

HIMYM1
Uploaded by coolhipfrank

hehe. I would say "keep your answers clean," but I don't see how that can be done.

media

2007-04-24T21:43:00.000-05:00

A couple of media things.

WFT?! How did I miss this! OJ Simpsons! It's a hilarious parody of the OJ Simpson thing starring the FOX's The Simpsons!! Homer's black! Three episodes.
Enjoy.

Everyone and their dogs should be watching How I Met Your Mother!! It's GREAT! I'll have clips from the show more often. And they will be better and my own creations. I just found this one on YouTube. The first one should be the best one.

Presenting Robin Sparkles!

When life gives you a hilarious name...

2007-04-19T21:16:00.000-05:00

write a horrible book with a horrible title to match!

Ladies, Gentlemen and Eric..

I present to you a book, The Flip Side by Flip Flippen!!

Come on, you guys. If Eric's relative, Penny Nichols, filmed a documentary about the historical significance of coins, you would TOTALLY buy it! Just like an antagonist's last name, you know they were born to be evil.

Many, many years ago when people were referencing eachother by groans, roars and hand gestures (ie. the gay neanderthals?) We decided to give ourselves and eachother names that best described the person. And if this guy's ancestors were all "In a couple hundred years, I think I'm gonna write a book about flipping!" So they named theirselves Flippen. Of course it was probably spelled Flipping, but then somewhere down the line, they changed it... probably cause it was too flip. (hehe, get it!)

Well, I thought it was funny. I guess it isn't funny if I keep going on and on about it. meh... I need to practice my 'Homerow keys' typing anyway.

Ciao.

this apartment sucks!

2007-04-16T01:20:00.000-05:00

So if you haven't heard it through the grapevine yet, Jason and I have found and sign a lease for a new place. The lease starts May 1st. The leasor is a cool guy and is letting us move in as soon as he gets the place sparkling. Yeah... during the showing he was all "I'll throw in a fresh coat of paint!" But he didn't have to try that hard to sway us. We were practically sold before we even saw the joint.

Anyways we couldn't really decide if we were making an actual upgrade in living space, or was it a lateral move...

Let's look at it more objectively:

GOOD - it's cheap
BAD - neighborhood is questionable. I mean, on one side of the place there's a cute elementary school and the other is a nail salon/ liquor store. (Yes, both!)
GOOD - Hardwood floors. drools.
BAD - Even though, my room is huge... my closet is not only small, but it is going to be the washer-dryer room aswell. DAMMMIT!
GOOD - Not insanely far away. The places that we were looking at before were like in Plano and Duncanville.. so this locale is better than I ever thought.
BAD - Moving is going to be a bitch. Well, I suppose that one goes with anywhere we move.
VERY GOOD - My would-be bedroom isn't leaking at the moment.

Yup. After the whole radiator fiasco last time, the water has now come back wih a vengence. Instead of coming from the apartment next door, it's coming from the apartment above me. WTF, people!! Fix your own damn water crisis. My poor room! At least I have super hearing and noticed the leak before it made any water damage unlike last time. Geez, I bet the mantainance people hate me. But I don't care!!

This apartment sucks! I can't wait till I move out in a few weeks.

So now I'm waiting for the emergency mantainence guy. Ugh, it's late and I have the works tommorrow. I'm gonna be pissed all day. All this damn water, I feel like it's the seventh day and that Samora chick is trying to get me! Just when we got rid of M. Night Shyamalan! I suppose a good thing about this situation is that they do have an oncall mantainence guy. I'm not sure if they do at the new condo.

Crap, I'm crazy tired. I hate people... and water.

Undressed 1

2007-04-11T22:42:00.000-05:00

This is my very first attempt at media blogging. I don't know if I'm gonna do it like this or in a different way. I'm just trying new things out and seeing if they fit or whatever.

Anyways, this used to be one of my favorite shows. I remember watching it all the time sophomore year in college. Recently, MTV reaired some episodes so this was my chance to capture them and use them to start my media blog extravaganza! I always thought this show was hilarious. The plotlines, the acting, the script.. I mean come on!! It's pure camp.

Here is one of the storylines in the show.

A precocious girl, Annette and her two BFFs Kate and Tanya have always been considered geeks in school. And they have accepted their label and have even made themselves nerdier by having a chastity pack. It's not a "no sex till marriage" thing... No No No!! That would be too easy. It's a "you can't lose your virginity till we all lose our virginity!" kinda thing.
The scene begins in the locker room (insert "woot" and/or "Ooos" here) where Annette finds that she accidentally packs her brothers gym shirt instead of her own. Now, her younger brother is obviously manorexic naturally, so the shirt leaves nothing to the imagination when Annette wears it revealing her boobs (re: boobs!)
"You're not going to wear that?!" one girl cries. "We made a pack!" [virginity pack monolouge] "That tight shirt is going to lead to sex!!" Where's my holy water?! I think the fact that they didn't put a religious spin on the plot makes it funnier because the girls are just prudish for nothing.
Of course she gets noticed by the boy that she has always had the biggest crush on. So she swoons and giggles with her friends over it. With the virginity pack repeated like 7 times. It's beginning to look like Kate is the most prudish one. Why do the red heads always gotta be bitches? hehe.
Anyways, the less prudish one with the flat chest (I supposed she's here for the comedic relief of being unattractive AND have no boobs) orders pizza knowning that Annettes crush, Rick, is the pizza delivery guy.
The girls giggle and repeat the virginity pack before Annette sluts it up before Rick shows up. Awww, Rick asks her out. And she's excited. This is the guy Annette has been dreaming about dating and now (thanks to her rack) she's going out with him to the movies. And Kate has managed to say "Going to the movies with a cute guy?! You're gonna end up havig sex!!!" with a straight face.
All is well, everyone is getting what they want... but does Rick, the star jock, really care about Annette (no.) and how is he going to treat his (obviously eager to please and geeky) date Annette???

If you have ever watched Undressed, you'd know that there are like 4 different storyline going on at once. So I just spliced and pasted clips together. It will be a little choppy, but still watchable. I am LOVING the TVtuner and software I have!! This is the first episode.
Enjoy.

Undressed1_2
Uploaded by coolhipfrank

More episodes to come!

stupid taxes

2007-03-31T21:43:00.000-05:00

At work we all won mp3 players. I think I mentioned that to you guys.

We finally received them the other day. I already had the awesomeness that is my Ipod Video (drools), so I gave mine to my sister. She loved it, by the way.

So they totally taxed my paycheck this pay period for it!! Bitches! Like they don't trust us to honestly report it in our own tax returns. Geez, where's the trust?

Anyways, previous employees can still pick their MP3 players up... and I hope they don't report it!!! Viva la revolucion!!

Hey, did you hear that the Mexicans are marching for immigrant rights again tommorrow?! I hope it goes well. I'm not going. Yeah, it's my day off. But I'll be asleepin'!! I wish them well though.

In other news, I'm gonna go watch the movie, Blades of Glory again tonight. You guys should see it. Loves it.

TV!

2007-03-27T23:22:00.000-05:00

LOVING THIS!

Apparently someone feels so strongly about American Idol contestant Sanjaya still being on the show, they decided to do a non-violent protest via self starvation. As you know, I am an avid American Idol watcher. And I am down with this cause. Go, hunger strike go!!

Not today, I just went to Taco Bell.

In other Frank news, I bought a TV tuner for my computer. Now I can record and watch my favorite shows. It's like a TV and a VCR for the computer. If I didn't have a huge screened TV in my room at the moment, I would totally watch TV on my computer more. I just bought the tuner for getting my shows on my computer. Our cable is kinda weird (so it messes with the tuner) but it's cool! It came with video editing software. I just might turn this blog into a media bonanza. Anyways, for some freaky (re:sad) reason I have two tuners. One of them didn't go with my laptop, so I gave it to Jason. We might have to have a media rumble if he ever installs his. But I promise I'll do something cool with it and put it on the blog eventually.

oh shhyyt!

2007-03-19T22:32:00.000-05:00

My psuedo-Spring Break was amazing! Let me just describe the setting for ya...

Dad's new house

on demand cable on huge TV
free access to booze
Pool
Jaccuzzi
5 crazy younger siblings

My living situation
HELLO poolhouse!! Or like I call it, Bungaloo A

Wait... hold up...

A jaccuzzi, a free standing fireplace, AND a flatscreen TV... ALL TOGETHER?!
hells yea!

It was a recipe for funtimes! In addition to my awesome living situation, there was food and rides at the Stock Show. It's like a carnival with animals, games and rides. Loved it. Funnel Cakes! Deep-Fried Snickers! And I saw the Chupacabra!! For reals. See the pic to your right to see me upside-down!! Scary!

But probably the best part was I had the chance to see the rest of my family! They are so important to me. If you don't know me that well, ask me about them.. I can go on for hours talking about them. I love them. Here's some pics!!

Sisters-Michelle,Sam,&Janie, Dad flipping Sam, Dad's turn!, Janie, Brother Jonathan shooting, Sam&Stephan picking rubberducks, Michelle doing backflips, Stephan's grill-bling!, Me&Sam, SisterMichelle, BrotherStephan!, StephanClimbing, Don't Bother Michelle while she's texting!!, Sam,Janie&Stephan swim

Spring Break

2007-03-10T01:23:00.000-06:00

So here I am. It's like 1am, and I have to get up for work at 7am. Another 9-hour work day. Gotta love those full-time hours. sighs, yea...

All you kids out there that DON'T have jobs, I almost envy you. Well, I said almost.

I LOVE having money! I remember back when I was in school. All this free time, but no money. It's much cooler to have money and little free time. I can splurge on extravagant items for myself!

Like the i-Luv lithium battery pack for my Ipod Video. WOOT. It nearly kranks the juice up on my ipod times four!! drools.

Although, sometimes I do wish I had more than just a day or two off at a time. I can barely enjoy myself.

So that's why I'm doing Spring Break right!! I'm going to the Dad's for a week!!! YAY! That means free food, free booze, free late-night trips to Mexico, and free South Padre Island visits!!! AHHH! So excited.

Oh man, I heard Christy Chermak is heading there too. What if we like bumped into eachother. AWKWARD! I mean, we did have that little fling not too long ago. Christy swore me to secrecy, but I figured that it's been long enough. And I'm a Born Again Christian, so I can't lie about it anymore. I'm thinking heavenly thoughts now. Jesus is my personal Lord and Saviour! He will guide me throughout my life so that I can walk with him through the gates of heaven and cast out the demons and temptations of Hell!

Yeah, I need a time to breathe. I was going to break out in gospel song and Hallelujahs!

Praise Jesus! Praise God! Praise the Father! Praise the Son! Praise the Holy Spirit!

Get Saved. Amen.

shizznit!

2007-03-01T02:44:00.000-06:00

Guess who is going to be our new roommate?!

Click here to find out!

HAHA, made ya click!

You will be very surprised. But most likely not. It's Devon Barrett Moubry!

I am so insanely anxious about this new arrangement. I mean, yeah, this person is a friend and we have known him/her since the beginning. But do we mesh well? I remember in college when Jason and I were suitemates. We sort of got along, and we had the separate rooms for privacy. So it just worked, and we knew it could work in an apartment setting aswell. But this...

...is like jumping in head first with a person you haven't lived with ever. We might get along (meh?) in small drunkenly doses, but how is it going to be like having this person around 24/7?

I suppose this is for the best. I guess I'll have to start using three-roommate-person TV shows to make fun puns and such. I'm not using Three's Company!!! Cause in that instance I would have to refer to Jason as Suzanne Somers (yet again!) And the Will & Grace references are played out AND not to mention that Devon doesn't have all the episodes memorized like Jason and I do. Geez, we can't even plagarize a scene without Devon not getting it.

I can use How I Met Your Mother references though!! Jason has managed to get both Devon and I on the bandwagon. I'm Ted though. Devon and Jason make the perfect Marshell and Lily! They could do that disgusting thing where they chew on a strand of spagetti till they meet in the middle!

Yes, Devon.. that is a Will & Grace reference.

FYI, we are all moving in together in May and into a bigger place.

super hair!

2007-02-27T20:56:00.000-06:00

Okay so like everyone, I am totally obsessed with the show, Heroes.

It has everything we love about X-men and it airs once a week! How awesome is that?

You know, I normally don't doubt this show but sometimes things in Heroes just bug me because they are so improbable. I know!! It's a show about people with powers. Why does this worry me so much? Anyways, I usually can overlook some things but with this last episode I just cannot hold it in anymore.

Just to bring you up to speed, story-wise, Claire (has super healing powers) dives into her house to save her Evil/Good/Secret Agent Dad from a radioactive explosion. (Thanks to that radioactive guy, d'er) So she saves her Dad AND tranquilizes the radioactive guy. She comes out of the house all burnt and then heals herself before our very eyes. Everyone's in awe.

'cept me. I was like "bullshit!"

Observe this before/after comparison.

CLAIRE'S HAIR IS UNTOUCHED THE WHOLE TIME!!

sighs. Am I supposed to believe that Claire risked deactivating the ammonium thioglycolate by getting your hair ~~wet~~ burnt within 48 hours? Her blonde locks were still intact!!

In her defense, Hayden Panettiere did used to do those Neutragena commericals. I suppose while eliminating blackheads she also used some hair stuff too. In fact (I did alittle researching) they do have this new hairstuff:

Neutrogena Triple Moisture™ Healing Shine Serum remedies dryness and damage all the way down to the tips.

Go beyond surface shine with this extraordinary daily leave-in treatment that actually helps repair damage. Treat frazzled and split ends, restoring strength and moisture to weak, dehydrated hair with three naturally derived extracts. Olive penetrates to the center of the hair strand, Meadowfoam Seed helps moisturize the middle and Sweet Almond wraps the surface. A single use will leave your hair brilliantly shiny and healthy looking from root to tip.

Oh yeah! I need me to get some of that stuff!

new era

2007-02-23T02:16:00.000-06:00

I think Jason and I have hit a whole new era of roommate-ness that can only be described in the conversation we had a while ago.

Frank: You should try this new face moisturizer I've been using. It's the shit!
Jason: Oh yeah?
Frank: Yeah, we need to start worrying about our fading youth.
Jason reads label: Pond's radiance restored age-defying skin brightening SPF 15 moisturizer.
Frank: Have you been noticing my new found radiance?!

Jason puts some on.

To quote my idol, Jessica Simpson...

"Twenty-five is almost thirty, which is halfway to fifty, which is halfway to middle age!"

Jason then goes on to talk about his moisturizing adventures including crafty shopping tips from Mom.

It seems so far from the time when we were all eighteen high-step marching in 100 degree weather... what? sunblock? I'm not gay!!

AHH

2007-02-18T19:52:00.000-06:00

Apartment flooded!

The radiator from next door (the model apartment, ironically) broke and the problem elevated to MY apartment. sighs

But the flooding is only in my part of the apartment. The living room and Jason's room are still intact.

DAMMIT!!

contest results.

2007-02-12T22:06:00.000-06:00

For those of you people who didn't know. The whole works corporation was having a sales contest to see who could sell the most (sales percent by volume) Sony E-Readers.

These things cost like 3 hundred something dollars. They are not easy to sell. Yes, they are somewhat popular, but not so much in some areas.

The store's employee's (ALL OF THEM) would get the following prizes for placing:

First Place: Digital Camera
Second Place: Dvd player
Third Place: MP3 player

I don't remember the brands or whatever, I just know I wanted free shit.

ANYWAYS, the conest ended Dec. 26th.. and it took then FOREVER to get the results. In fact, we are technically waiting for them now. But the manager in her words "bribed" someone for the results. hehe. Shhh, don't tell anyone!

We placed third...

IN THE NATION!!! HELLO!

Anyways, I'm happy. Sort of. Cause we kinda were looking to get the Dvd player cause mine broke (we think). Who cares though?! I'm getting an MP3 player! And it's not Apple, btw. So my Ipod Video won't get jealous... but my old Shuffle would of if I didn't give it to Becky.

This kinda makes up for the fact that our customers are mostly snobs.

the "I" in team

2007-02-05T02:15:00.000-06:00

The new position at the works is doing well. Going on a good start anyways. Now for some [re: all] of you peeps that don't know what I do, I'll explain.

So the place that I work at has this policy that I can't give out certain information about the company in web logs. I know! It's like they saw me coming and quickly wised up to all my internet doings. So I can't tell you guys everything that goes down, but I can give ya'll the basics.

I am part of a team. We are called IPT, which stands for Inventory Process Team. Now, remember this cause it's going to be important later. Basically we, as a collective unit, are in charge of everything that comes in and out of the store product and merchandizing wise.

Here are just a few of our duties:
If a pallet of books is brought in, we sign and process each box/item into the store inventory system. Making sure that we have all the items we ordered and are supposed to get at that specific time. Then we start sorting through the materials. Having a system of carts for each area of reference makes things a whole lot easier. While sorting, we have to keep track of which items need security devices such as with CDs or higher priced books. Then we finally take each cart and shelve the items into their respective sections.

Say some customer special-orders some obsure title. We have to research that title for stock approval. If not, we have to call the publisher and see if we can't get a request to send a copy to us.

Our company does do mail outs to residential, commerical and correctional facilities. We mail items or special request the items to be mailed.

Inventory mantainence. Ever wonder how we don't have books from the 70s crammed everywhere? Yeah, we RPL (return to publisher) ancient items.

We also have keys to places normal employees do not have. Shiny, shiny keys... that jingle.

We normally keep the same full time hours. No competing for hours. All the team works together. All other positions can function independantly...

This brings me to my point...

Who's on the team? How many people are on the team currently? How many people are left after the mass excidus over the last few weeks?

Umm, lemme see. There's me and then there's...

Only me!!!

Just call me IPF (Inventory Processor Frank). Yeah, I'm trying not to freak out. It's not so bad now, but I would hate to see it when things start to pick up like they do. Right now, I have to rely on other people (in other positions) to pick up the slack. I mean, it's not their job, they just have to do it. It is kinda fun bossing people around though. My favorite thing to do is to leave a whole library cart of Manga (crappy asian fiction that we get thousand of titles every week, but we have no room in section for them) in the elevator and tell the Upstairs Seller that I have a gift for them to shelve coming up. They will hate me eventually, but it's not my fault.

So anyways, yeah. That's what I do. Sometimes I feel like I work at FedEx or something. UGH. I keep telling myself AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH CUSTOMER SERVICE MUCH ANYMORE.

Little Tip

2007-02-01T23:19:00.000-06:00

I've decided that since I am so wise, I should start giving out little tidbits of it to the less fortunate [re: my friends]

Tip#1
Just because you can purchase wine till midnight [instead of 9pm for liquor], doesn't make it less potent.

I had to learn that the hard way at the WOOT, WE HAVE A LIQUOR CABINET party last Friday. I told Becky, the accountant, to account for me to stop drinking hard liquor after 12 and to start me up on lesser spirits (ie wine). Now of course Becky, being the most awesomest accountant I know, did the job perfectly. What Becky didn't tell me was that I was going to get shithoused. But I suppose I can't blame her for that. She is an accountant anyways. I am always shocked when she dresses herself all "non-accountant-y"

Anyways, yeah.

Wine can get your ass.

Later that night when I was throwing up in my bathroom, I almost freaked out but then realized that I had in fact drank red wine... and therefore wasn't puking blood.

Everytime I get that drunk, I have sophomore year flashbacks. I'll write more about that soon. Goodtimes.

Ft Worth

2007-01-26T17:05:00.000-06:00

Yeah, so I was at Ft Worth on Monday.

Did I mention I had to get up at 6am? Did I also mention that I had to carpool with the boss? You know, the one I can't stand. so yeah.

Funtimes.

Luckily I had my trusty Ipod Video with me. If it didn't pay for itself already, it sure did that day.

Anywho. The Ft Worth store was closing and people were called in to help with the packup. Did I mention that all the General Managers in the surrounding areas were required to attend? Did I also mention that the employee's attendance was strictly on a volunteer basis? That is with the exception of our store. I felt like that Daria episode were Principal Mrs. Lee made Jane and Daria submit their artwork in that contest. "Your daughter refused to participate in this voluntary event, so I made it mandatory!"

There were 5 of us there... All the other stores attendance was 2 tops. I was so bad.

So I was "assigned" to box making with some other girl [I totally thought she was a lesbian, but then she started talking about her daughter and baby's daddy. Wow, my LEZdar is so off]. At one point my manager come by to do some much needed mirco-managing. "It would be more efficient if you do [this or that]" I just replied with "Sorry, I guess I must of dozed off at the all important 'box making' part of my training"

It got a few laughs.

The day wasn't a complete bust. Free lunch at Chili's. But I did figure out that alot of Border's people are socially nerdy.. and just plain nerdy too. If it wasn't for my favorite real lesbian coworker, I wouldn't of had any fun. We talked about The L Word and Booze.

yippee

2007-01-21T00:36:00.000-06:00

Got a promotion and a raise today.

Is this the end of Frank's annoying interactions with snobby, cheap customers?

[I'm not holding my breath]

PS. I'm going to Fort Worth on Monday and Tuesday. I'm so excited; I think I'm going to use my miles! I hope Devon sprays some Febreze around or something before I go.

Do only stupid people buy stuff?

2007-01-16T17:55:00.000-06:00

If someone asks you if something is funny, do you lie?

I mean, I didn't laugh at your joke nor did I give any nonverbal facial expression to imply that I did...

So why would anyone ask a person if something is funny, if they know the answer?

Anyways, yea. That happened. Then she went on to say that I was bad at customer service... geez, I didn't realize that one of the many responsibilities of my job was to cater to the insecurities of the socially inept.

I'm sick of this "customer's always right" crap. People don't realize that even that statement has it's limits. What if a customer said that the aliens were coming tommorrow to take all of out brains, so we might as well give her a bigger discount? NO! sighs. Not only that... people think that the customer is always good, honest, funny and even fashionably dressed!

But that is never accurate.

[PS. I haven't forgot about my resolution. I'm working something up to put on the sidebar, so I can just update that weekly instead of making a whole weekly post about it. Yeah, and I sucked it up this week btw]

Week 1

2007-01-08T14:24:00.000-06:00

::drumroll::

[-8]

just a few thoughts

2007-01-02T22:40:00.000-06:00

1) It's extremely cold outside! Little Tip: Don't go outside in shorts. I was only checking the mail, but I nearly procured frostbite.

2) The New Years Resolution is up and going. I should be exercising more, but it just started. I am still trying to handle the "eating less" part. But I think I am gonna make it through.

3) Did I mention that DreamGirls rules!! Go see it!

4) Rented the complete series Freaks & Geeks... loving it.

5) MySpace has extended the profile picture limit to 300. Trying to control myself. Failing badly.

new years resolution

2006-12-31T21:51:00.000-06:00

I think I'm gonna actually follow through with my usual "lose weight" resolution. More specifically, I'm starting January 1 to March 10th.

Yup, I'm having Spring Break with my Dad this year! That means a free ride, free booze, and the antics that go with it.

I've lost weight in a short amount of time before, but I want this time to be documented. I will be updating weekly (that's the plan anyways) about my goal.

At least this will keep me blogging regularly again.

Okay, I'm not revealing my real weight... hehe, no. I will be using "X". Then [-HowMuchWeightILost] for the rest of the time.

PS. I know this sounds weird. It's more of a motivation tool than anything. And don't worry if I lose alot in one week. Fat people do that sometimes... perfectly healthy.

Yeah, I'm out of control! Wish me Luck.

PPS. If you see me eating junk food, you have my permission to slap me.

...

2006-12-29T19:36:00.000-06:00

geez, I hate people.

eww

2006-12-28T22:05:00.000-06:00

Guy walks in the Borders with a book to return. The book was Charles Frazier's Thirteen Moons. I noticed a smell. A spagetti smell. I thought to myself, "Ah.. he probably just went to lunch." But no... the smell wasn't coming from him.

I looked at the book, as I usually do. There was spagetti sauce all over the book!!!

EWWWW!

"I can't return this book; it's not in sellable condition."
He looks at me oddly. "Why?" he asks.
"There's sauce all over the book." As he looks confused, I show him the book.
"That couldn't of happen" he explains.
OOOH REEEALLY!

I confirm with the manager and tell him that we just can't do it. He huffs and puffs (like a small child) and stomps away.

Then he returns, and says it just wipes right off.

EWWWW!

I do the return, only to make him go away. I then do a damaged report on the book. No one should have to pick up a book only to have it smell like an italian dish of sorts. This isn't Barnes & Noble, you know.

Hey there, sonny!

2006-12-27T00:02:00.000-06:00

Someone called me "sonny" today at work. Do people still use that word? In her defense, she was old... and toothless.

Hair drama, yet again!

2006-12-23T21:06:00.000-06:00

So after a long deliberation, I finally decide I need to do something with my gorgeous hair. It's at the point where the slightest head movement would make my hair do a "movie-so-motion-hair-flip."

There's a place that just opened next to Borders called Floyd's Barbershop. It seems nice and is actually in my price range, which shocked me cause it's in the West Village! I go there during my lunch hour... meh, I might as well right? I'm in the neighborhood.

So I go in the place with the confident belief that I was only going to get a trim and style it professionally... yea.

I hacked it all off.

I don't know what happened. One mintue I'm telling the hair cutting chick that I love the length of my hair.. and the next thing I'm telling her to do "whatever"

Geez, I'm a pushover.

It paid off though. My hair looks awesome... everybody thinks so! Way better than last time I cut it short. My hair just looks good short AND long. I can't change that. But it's a struggle I have to deal with till the end of days...

Long? or Short?
Luxourious? or Sassy?
Preppy? or Punk?

sighs....

Gingerbread mania

2006-12-12T23:35:00.000-06:00

After reading the roommate's take on our Gingerbread Extravaganza '06, I guess I should put my two cents in with a different perspective.

So here are the differences between our viewpoints.

Although Jason makes excellent observations by explaining them in great detail and with a great deal of eloquence, I have pictures!!! Take it!

The whole dissonance of opinion can be easily viewed in this two pics.

The SMUers did make cookies... white sugar cookies... uhuhmmmm.

But to say that these kids didn't go wild would be an understandment... they did managed to dirty EVERYTHING in the kitchen by exploding blender full of rum.

Did you see Megan's "talented and gifted 4th grade teacher" haircut! hehe. Loves it.

that Devon...

Here's all the pics from the party. enjoy.

Megan&me, CrazyLuke&Devon, SmileyCory&Devon,Meg&Devo, Jason&thewife, Becky&Luke, WifeyProposing toHubby, Devon&Cory, Devo&Luke, Luke&Meg, Becks&Cory, LukeCoryBecks, cookies, heyLovers, BordersCrew, Houseroof, MakeOut!, Wes, Frank&Nathan, HouseMaking, HouseMaking2, Becks&Monica.

FUUUUCK!

2006-12-05T03:44:00.000-06:00

So the worst thing ever just happened!

My video ipod went crazy and deleted EVERYTHING! I am going insane right now. All those songs, movies, and TV shows gone! And of course I didn't back them up. I'm not that smart.

Anyways, I have already uploaded everything I have on my laptop, but that still leaves like 20 gigs of space on my ipod.

I'll be downloading/converting/uploading vids all week y'all!

Anywho, onward to slighty better news.

---------------------

Christmas is once again apon us, and with the holiday spirit comes Gingerbread house making party! wooot. It's like the 4th annual one or something.. meh. Should be funtimes. I think Jason is going to finally reveal his new beau to masses (e.g. friends) at said party. Although I reminded him of the curse, he is going along with it anyway. You haven't heard of 'the Curse?' Lemme 'splain.

You can't bring a beau (or hoe) a gingerbread house party ever! The relationship with be destined to end and end with a bang (and by 'bang' I don't mean in the good way!) This theory has been tested for significance and therefore is proven factual.

So lets just see how the Curse plays out this time. Party's on Friday.

---------------------

Jason makes a snowman (in the cold) while Frank watches from afar (in the heated apt)

Oh yea, I know you guys noticed my hair (as usual). It's still growing. Gettin' sexier every minute. Here's on pics for you guys. They will last longer than all of your envious stares.

-------------------------
I've been watching alot of TV on DVD lately. I special ordered (thanks to the lovely Borders Books Music Movies and Cafe!) the tv show Popular seasons 1 & 2. Can't get enough of it!! And man... EVERYONE had a cameo on this show! Sandra Oh, Wentworth Miller, Clea Duvall, Delta Burke, Erik Estrada... well that's about it, but it is still cool. But ya gotta love Leslie Grossman!

Jason's Bday!

2006-11-07T00:08:00.000-06:00

Jason's Bday was a success! Obviously cause I was there.

heh.

Here are some highlights. enjoy.

Jason before the party. Yea... he's NOT drunk in this pic. But I do think he's a crackhead! Poor, poor Jason. We need to get him into NA.

Meanwhile, Devon was practicing her new Burlesque act...

But she did focus her attention on one other thing during the party. She's so driven these days.

Couple Sean and Jami were having their own problems at the time.

I had to do this... Eric is just too fun!

Most Drastic Change during the party goes to me... wow. I did throw up later after everyone left. hehe.

I think the only ones drunker than I was were my non-SMU friends. hehe. That Wes... sighs.

And I couldn't help noticing... When Becky gets drunk, she turns into Debbie Gibson!

And I turn into Barney Gumble!

All in all, it was a good party. Yes, I was hungover ALL day during work and it was worth it. My only regret is that I didn't get any pictures of Megan and her new "4th grade Teacher" haircut. It's so stereotypical! I almost feel bad for making fun of it.

cord is cut

2006-11-02T00:25:00.000-06:00

My SMU webpage is officially gone!

It's so sad. It's like a huge part of my life is over. Frank's Insane WebPage was all me!!

sighs.

So along with the webpage, went the stuff I had on it. So I didn't really care about anything except the links I made!! As you can see, the links on the side of this blog are non-existent. I need to make more. It's going to be a fun adventure. You all now can go check out my links for new and fun stuff on the internet that Frank is checking out!

Stay Tuned!

I have a roommate? huh?

2006-10-27T03:11:00.000-05:00

So yeah.

Our schedules have the tendency to be contradicting. It's been about a good two weeks since we've actually conversed for like more than a second. (other than the usual call to confirm that one of us has set the VCR to record a show) It's getting pretty odd.

I've been roommates with this guy for over a year we've always been in this situation every evening:

Jason: I'm bored.
Frank: I'm bored.
Jason: What do we do?
Frank: ...
Jason: Entertain me!

That would go on for like an hour till we finally decide to go rent a movie. It was always like this. It was a routine that never failed to incessantly happen.

I guess we have lives now (or something). But I kinda miss it like the way you feel when you've done something so much for so long, you expect it--the familiarity of it all.

Well, I'm exaggerating a little about the "lives" part. Jason has his normal 9 to 5 job, and I have my crazy-rollercoaster-hours job. Between that, visiting family, trips to the ER and dating, there's no extra time.

So I joined Alumni Band. Yeah, I know. That's so weird! But on the bright side, it gave me a reason to demand days off. So now I have my Saturdays back, which is AWESOME! It makes me wish I still worked at a school, even though I woud have to deal with children (shudder) and parental neurosis. Anyways, so when I don't have a game I have my Saturday free!! woot.

Where the hell was I? Oh yeah.

Next Saturday (Not this Saturday, but the next one) is Jason's bday party! woot.

So come to it, you guys! It is kind of going to be the first time that Jason and I are going to be in the same room for more than a few minutes. Should be good times.

(Yeah. I do have THIS Saturday off, but I have a date [insert smirk here]. And I think Jason might have one too I wasn't paying attention, but I think he was making it up)

PS. I've been struggling to decide whether or not to invite some of my fellow coworkers to Jasons Bday. I mean, sure he doesn't know them... but they are cool. They can add some much needed color to Jason's usual "boring orange" self.

hehe. I was having a talk with one of my FAVORITE coworking about this subject:

Frank: Do you think I would invite some of the people here to the party?
Amanda: Invite me and get me drunk!
Frank: It's like you're in my head.

It's not like we're having this huge thing, but I want it to be good. Quality over quantity, you know.

Going through the partylist
definites:
Jason
Frank
Devon
Becky
Eric

maybes:
Monica
Lauren
Paul
Jeremy
Cory
Megan
Mark
other SMU peeps

Coworkers that I would invite:
Amanda (YAY)
Adriana (2nd fav.. don't tell her that though!)
Merritt
Matty
Wes (sighs)

I would totally invite ALL the people I work with. They are so likeable. Except Krista, she's a bitch. Yesterday she tried to asked me to switch days with her. (Switching to that I would work on the day of this party) I was like HEEELL NO! I guess I want these people to see a different part of me. The part that all my SMU friends already know.

Even though it is Jason's party, it's still about me!! But I'm getting him a kick ass gift anyway.

Geez, yo

2006-10-17T02:03:00.000-05:00

I didn't have work today till 7pm, which rocks. I get to stay up as late as I want, and sleep practically all day. I am finding that these times are the highlights of my week. Pretty sad, eh? Well I don't care, I'm a cheap date like that.

So I'm enjoying one of these times. It's probably 8 or 9 something AM, so I was naturally dead asleepin' when I wake up to a scratching at my door. What the hell?! I just went to sleep like 2 hours ago. I get up, with the comforter wrapped around me, opened the door to find the roommate at the door. Apparently his little incident (I'm sure he will blog about it soon, so I won't give it all away) involving cutting his finger had progessively worstened.
I spend the next few minutes trying to rebandage his wounds. Ugh, my eyes were foggy and flourescent lights weren't helping. It wasn't easy, but I managed to get the thing on with only a few blood-curdling yelps from Jason. Then we was all like "I'm going to the ER"

I volunteer to go with him, like the good roommate I am. Besides if Jason dies, I would have to move in with Devon.. ewww. Anyways, we go to Baylor and of course the ER is like under construction and we don't know where the hell we are going. It's raining, but I managed to grab a jacket before we left.
Since Jason lacerated his left-handed/writing hand, I had to fill out forms and laugh when he tried to write right handed. But the hardest part was when he was getting examined and I waited in the lobby place.

UGH! People in the hospital are so dramatic! They will do anything to get attention. First of all, we're in the "minor accident ER." That means if you are assigned there, your injury cannot be life threatening. Jason mangled his finger and blood was gushing out of it. If you have a toothache, go to the denist!!

Yeah, so there was this guy who was moaning bloodly murder about his tooth. I did bring my ipod (sweet), but coincidentally Jessica Simpson was on the Rachel Ray show and you know I gots to watch that shit!! The guy was ruining my Jessica Simpson TV watching experience! How rude. And she was cooking too!

Oh yeah, so if you see Jason try to be sensitive to his deformed hand. Freaks have feelings too.

(PS. Jason's bday party, Nov.4)

nerd-curious

2006-10-13T02:03:00.000-05:00

Every once and a while, Frank decides to take up something new. It's like a leap year type of occurance. He likes certain things and that's it. When he does try new things, it's crazy insane.

There was that time when he tried the Atkin's Diet in college. He doesn't talk about the experience much because it was hell, but he lost 40 pounds. One day he will show you pictures to prove it. They are quite dramatic.

Then there was the girlfriend. What? Frank is straight now?! I'm confused. Well, we all were. Some are still trying to grasp the concept even now that it's long over, but who can blame them? Frank is an idol to most.

Perhaps the biggest one was when a shy, scared then freshman, went to his first college party. He doesn't usually drink, so decides to drink one of everything. Frank then goes on the next year to break the record in drinking a pitcher of beer in an organization that may or may not exist.

Now it's time for another huge leap for Frank.

But what can it be? It seems like Frank has conquered everything. Well, not everything. There's like two things Frank hasn't done. One is curing cancer. Okay, perhaps three things: Curing Cancer, Walk through the concord on Haskell without having birds try to poop on him AND...

Join the internet RPG video game sensation!

(hehe, it's kinda fun talking in 3rd person. Love it)

It's not like I'm playing World of Warcraft (yet). I'm playing Guild Wars, cause I think paying to be a nerd would be too much for me. I can't afford to be poor AND socially inept.

thank you training videos

2006-09-30T04:04:00.000-05:00

Guy walks in. He wants to return a CD. He has the receipt. The receipt is from Chicago and shows that he returned a previous item to buy the CD he is about to return. It shows he paid with a combination of store credit and cash. He wants cash back.

Not so unusual. Perhaps he's just cheap.

After managerial approval, the dubious cashier completes the return transaction. Then immeadiately afterwards, the guy pulls out three more returns each one with its own receipt just like the initial return.

The cashier thinks to himself, "You greedy bastard!"

He then calls the manager for every and any little thing fishy about the next transaction.

What? The CD wrapping is slighty torn?
Hey? This receipt looks odd?
Oh? You want Chicago tax too?
Jigga Who? You're wondering why I have to call the manager so many times?

After a while, the manager FINALLY gets what the young diligent cashier is nonverbally communicating to him.

The manager now takes charge. He tells the guy that we cannot complete his requested returns and asks him to leave.

The guy them prepares to have a temper tantrum, with first expressing that he is in fact going to have one if he does not get his way.

Temper Tantrum executed with the usual characteristics:
1) Loudness
2) Flailing of arms
3) Curses the "corporate machine"
4) Threads of calling police
5) Harsh words directed to manager (i.e. "you're an ugly person")
6) Make eye contact with as many customers as possible
7) Just as the manager calls the authorities, guy storms out.
8) He doesn't forget his CDs either.

People don't make this shit up!

a price for everything

2006-09-29T03:37:00.000-05:00

So the work posted a bulletin up stating that if anyone wanted extra hours (overtime included), they were available for us. All we had to do was RLP (basically pull items off the shelf). It sounded easy enough. And extra hours?! HELLS YEA!

The RPL was scheduled for Thursday night. I was already working 7 to close, so why not? I signed up. Store closed at 11ish and I started RPLing. They gave me the kids section. At first I thought, this couldn't be bad. I would just have to find Green Eggs & Ham or some junk like that. Everything is in it's place; alphabetized, catagorized and ready to be pulled.

Boy was I so wrong.

My first Kids subsection was Games. Ooh, I see the sign. How convenient. I'm so on top of this. The game section is like six shelves. I have about 30 items to pull just on these small six shelves. So easy. I look the the first item. The Author, Title, and BINC was listed. I pull random book just to see where the Cs were at... Hmmm, the book seems to be in the wrong section. KIDS GIFTS, it read. Well that's not right. Oh well. I pull the next book, and the author is Thomas. Ahem... T? That shouldn't be here either... So after a while I realized that I was going to have to search for each book/activity kit by browsing the whole section. It didn't help that the kid shelf are miniaturized for a child's conveniance. Damn kids... gotta be all short.

After an hour my back, my neck, my knees are all sore. UGH.

I'm searching through these obscure authors/publishing kid stuff. It's hard! I jump for joy when I see something that needs to be RPL'd from Disney or Batman cause it's something familiar that I probably can find easily.

Kakuro for Kids: The Ninja Edition
Pom Pom Pets
Doll Hair
Quilt your own patch!

Even those were some of the easy ones. I just hated the ones with titles that couldn't be properly deciphered like Amer Girl HT H'psc'th KT

Damn you abbreviations! Damn me for the one day I didn't bring my ipod!! That would of been helpful.

I did learn that time flies when you're frustrated looking for something called Paper Fun. Paper Fun?! What the hell can that mean?! Yes, it's in the Kids CRAFTS section. It costs 24.95 so it should be a big package, right?! Where are you?!! Screw that. It will be lost to the Kid Section forever.

I didn't finish. Not even close by the time the boss was all like "You guys still here? It's like 2:30." nonchalantly. Yeah, right.. she knew we were here slaving over misplaced books. I suggested that we just set fire to the entire Children's Section. Who would miss it? We don't even like kids at bookstores anyway! If you want a kid related item, go to Barnes & Noble for storytime.

We don't want you here!

Comic

2006-09-25T02:26:00.000-05:00

So I've decided that I am going to start up drawing comics again. For all of you people who don't know the joy that is my comics [aptly named The Wacky Adventures of Devon, Jason and Jim], it should be funtimes.

It's not going to be exactly what I did last time. Characters are different! There is revamping due to better technology and my drawing skills/patience/time/interest for it has shifted toward the positive realm. Keep in mind that the first couple of things are going to be crude and this whole blog is going to be changing along too.

New/slightly different layout.
New comics.
New wacky adventures.

Stay tuned kids.

[Disclaimer: The characters in my comics, although bear striking resemblances, are fictional. It's a fine line between referencing reality and fantasy. If you and/or someone you know is character'D or mentioned, just get over it. If I hate/hated you, expect it... these are my coping mechanisms. You don't like it? Go to hell]

so routine

2006-09-13T23:10:00.000-05:00

Wow, I'm so boring now.

Transaction #1294

[Guy walks up to me}
Guy: To answer your questions... YES, NO and NO!

[WTF?]

Frank:....

Guy: You know. The 3 things you're going to ask me.

Frank: So... how was your day, sir?

Guy: That's not what your supposed to ask me.

Frank: What am I supposed to say?

Guy: You're supposed to ask me if I found everything.

Frank: Seeing that you're going to buy obscure boating magazines, I'm sure you have all we have... you werido.

[Not exactly what I really said, but I was thinking it]

Frank: so... just curious... what are the other questions I was going to ask you o' wise one?

Guy: Then you were going to ask me if I had My Borders Reward Card... then if I wanted one.

[OMG, you're psychic! There are literally hundreds of specially marketed promotions of Borders Rewards all over the freakin' store! And you just knew I was going to ask you if you had the most visable item. Geez, do you tell the McDonalds people that you don't want fries with that too?]

Frank: uh huh.

Frank: Well, do you know all about our Corporate Group Plan? Let me just call our representative. She will tell you ALL about this program. It's super neat. This will just take a moment.

[I proceeded to ignore him for a while, then I actually called the rep. The whole transaction took at way longer than it should.]

Don't mess with Frank! He will mock you and call it apple sauce.

Transaction #3340

[Guy comes up to me. I know him. He comes here all the time. Always grumpy. Rude. And acts as if the whole world must revolve around him. He takes his sweet time, but when he's ready to go, it's time to go. The WORLD must cater to his "IgottaGO" mentality. Anyways, I hate him. Why must he come always when I'm working.]

Before I even get into my "Did you find everything" banter, he grabs his cell phone and wonders off. Like that's going to stop me. I just casually stand there, waiting for him to get off. Don't you hate it when people are on the phone?! Geez. If you don't like human interaction, go to Amazon!!
Anyways he finally realizes that his plan isn't working, so he goes up and says that he's ready.
ASS.
I start up. Damn him. Curses.
And just when I feel totally defeated, his cell rings.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I needed a good laugh. Do you think he hear me?

LESSON OF THE DAY: If you are going to shop at a huge corporation, expect some unwanted solicitations.

25 years

2006-09-05T05:22:00.000-05:00

Somehow, turning 25 has become a huge milestone for me.

It's just like any other number right? It comes after 24, just before 26. What is the big deal about 25?

After all this time, I feel complete. My childhood, teen years, and college days are over. This is a starting point for me. I do not think the same as I once did; I do not feel the same as I once felt. I'm not longer that guy who tries to please the people around him. The guy who spent so much time on other people, that he sometimes ignored what he wanted. I am.

I know who I am; it is time to express it.

Another Gay Movie

2006-09-02T00:31:00.000-05:00

Thanks to the renting smorgasbord plan we have from Blockbuster, Jason and I can indulge in ever guilty pleasure movie the place has to offer. Although Blockbuster doesn't offer actual pornographic material (you pervs!), it does offer a catagory of movies aptly named "Community Favorites." When you live in an area that was once deemed "the ghetto" and is now one of the trendiest places to be at, you can be assured that the Gays are involved. So Gay = Community.

So naturally, we are skilled in the art that is Gay-themed Movies. Who knew there was that many movies out there. I definitely didn't.

This brings me to my point. Another Gay Movie was released today, and I thought it would be fun to go. Going to see a gay movie in theaters? I know, it's madness! But I just got paid and needed something to do. Let me fill you in on Gay movie watching ettitquette at the theater. 1) Always go to a theater that only shows independent movies. Don't go to Lowes or AMC!! You're just asking for it. 2) No food allowed! Eating is unattractive. 3) If you look at someone for more than 2 seconds, you are legally obligated to have sex with him. (Okay, that's not true... for me, at least!) 4) Never go alone!! If you must, bring a random girl along. It's ironic, so you'll look intelligent. But not too smart to pretend you don't know it's irony.
So since it was mid-afternoon, I invited Becky. I don't know why I did. I guess I should of known better...

First of all, before I go into the 'Horrors of Watching a Gay Movie with Becky!' let me just tell you guys.... this movie ROCKED!!! The best comedic gay movie I've ever seen. Better than High School Musical, ya'll. Usually, gay movies are about "coming out" or "tackling societal issues" and all that boring overdone stuff. It's very odd that gay movies are basically all about these things. I never really realized it before. I can't think of a gay movie where the main character doesn't cry, doesn't get bullied, and/or doesn't comes to terms with himself. Even in the comedies. But this movie delivers everything (and I mean everything) that those gay sappy movies do not. This leads me to the reason I wrote this blog...

Horrors of Watching this Gay Movie with Becky!

Only girl in the audience. We thought there was this old lady in the front row, but it turned out to be an old man with femininely-styled gray hair.

Luckily, I did cover her eyes. I had promised Becky that we would leave if it got too raunchy. hehe. There were 39 times when I thought Becky was going to say "See ya!"

Signature Becky laugh (eg. BLAHHHHHHAHW!)

Everything aside, I have to give it up for Becky. She's lasted to the end. A weaker girl wouldn't of.

On a related note, we saw a trailer for Jesus Camp. Geez, this movie is going to give me nightmares!!

perfection overload

2006-08-28T01:08:00.000-05:00

Are today's graphic artists just not trying anymore? Or are they all obsessed with designing video game characters that they forgot how to humans look?

Seriously?! This is ridiculous.

What happened to the days when a photographed half nude celebrity was CGI'd realistically? A couple of flaws here and there. It's what makes a person attractive. Not perfection.

Now I know this subject is a little biased. It's Janet Jackson after all. She's like 47 or something, right? And she supposedly lost like 50 pounds in two weeks or some shit like that. Her "Jazzercising with Paula Abdul" Dvd must be broken from playing it too many times. OR she had some help from Jesus... Dr. Jesus... head of surgery Jesus.

Could she need this much work to look remotely normal? That can't be possible, right? I mean, she looks like an anime character.

I wouldn't be surprised if this was really her next cover.

On an unrelated note, party at Cory's house on Saturday. It's the "SMU's lst game of the season -slash- Frank Bday" celebation. So mainly it's a gathering of random people watching me get actin' a fool. Oh yeah, and I think there will be other things... but who cares about that?! It's all about Me! ME! ME!!

Apartment IMing

2006-08-25T02:47:00.000-05:00

Frank: [refering to the July 29, 2006 cover of The Economist and it's misspelling of 'globalization']
Frank: This magazine cover bothered the hell out of me at work all day!!
Jason: Do you have something against boats?
Frank: Look at the cover.
Frank: Notice something?
Jason: What am I missing?
Frank: globalization.
Jason: What? It's British.
Frank: whatever!
Frank: colour MY ASS!
Jason: HAHAHAHA

jealous much?

2006-08-18T17:24:00.000-05:00

boo yah, sucka!

yo muy excited.

2006-08-17T01:23:00.000-05:00

One of my guilty pleasure websites of all time is Maddox's The Best Page In The Universe webpage. And if you visit religiously (like ya do), you would know that the creator wrote a book featuring his best work.

We have his book The Alphabet of Manliness at Border's (it's doing quite well, I might add).

That isn't the best part. Maddox is doing a signing and discussion of his book at the store!!

September 14, 2006
7:30pm
Border's West Village

Shit, I hope I'm not working so I can go to enjoy it all. Cause if I have to ask Maddox for his Border's Rewards Card, I'm gonna be pissed.

Borders Banter

2006-08-09T02:24:00.000-05:00

[Guy comes up to me with a bunch of magazines. He is wearing one of those stupid floppy beach hats. I think to myself, "He kinda looks like that guy from Prison Break... meh. Someone that famous couldn't wear a hat like that!]

The next day...

Boss: Yeah, make sure we have those Prison Break Season One Dvds out because that guy comes to our store alot.

Me: oh shit... I mean, oh fecal matter!

I knew I should of gone with my gut and shouted "OHHHH MY GAAAWD! It's Wentworth Miller! Gimme your autograph!! And lose that hideous beach hat!"

PS. He passed on the Rewards... that ass. I don't remember which magazines he bought, but I'm completely sure that he's on the cover of a mag this month... What a showboat!! Can't he make his Dad shop for mags for him like Owen Wilson does?!

Buca di Beppo

2006-08-08T02:10:00.000-05:00

Oh man, serious you guys!

You all need to go to Buca di Beppo right now. It is AMAZING!

The Becky was in town so we all (Erich and Jason) went to that restaurant. First of all, there's like a bunch of crap on the walls, tables and ceilings. It was like the designer was from Tuscany, and just went to Fridays/Benniggans/Shake's, and was drunk, and has a sever case of ADHD. I was like oh shit, till I actually saw the content of all the cludder. It was like naked Italians... this I like.

To get to our table, you have to go through the kitchen. How odd. Then our actual table had two huge-ass cans of tomato sauce. WFT?!

It has family-style food portions so we ordered spagetti & meatballs and cannelloni. They were heaven! I'm still drooling over it. Delicious.

Other than the fact that Becky brought up accounting, it was a cool restaurant experience.

I would reccomend it to all.

I can't wait!!

2006-08-02T22:08:00.000-05:00

It's like a month till my birthday and I can't wait for it!!

So since I'm employed and whatnot, I've decided to get myself some very unneccessary and awesome. I thought about this for a long time. What can I get for myself that I really don't need?

Here is what I really need:
1) New glasses/ Prescription
2) New clothes.
3) a proper Bed... perhaps?
4) maybe a little nestegg for future/ emergency needs

Screw all that!!

I've decided to get a 30gb Video Ipod. Hey.. I have a shuffle, and yes, it's sufficient... but why not upgrade? Plus, I can get a 10% discount if I buy it at work. hehe.

Loves it.

I'm getting a white one though. I'm such an ipod racist!

[PS. Birthday plans/ parties haven't been planned as of yet. But I'm sure I'll do something... and yes, I'll be driiizzunk at said event(s)]

BR

2006-08-02T22:06:00.000-05:00

this week = 65.5%

DAAAAAMN!

Borders Banter

2006-07-30T19:55:00.000-05:00

Me: Would you like a sac?
Guy: Don't ask a quarterback that!

[uh huh]

kids and geeks rejoice

2006-07-29T05:46:00.000-05:00

Today is Harry Potter's birthday. Can you imagine that the boy who lived is still living?! Don't the past tense mean that he is gonna die soon? The boy battles great evils and survives to enter his awkward teenage years.

sighs.

Anywho. If you are wondering why Frank knows Harry Potter's Bday, it is not what you think. I don't like Harry Potter or any related fictional character. The only association I have is from the movies that I was forced to watch and the one and a half books in the series that I have read. No. No. No.

As you guys probably know, it is now my job to know this kind of information. So if someone comes up to me and asks "What is on July 29?" I have the pain-staking pleasure of that knowledge.

Damn you.

So "Border's Books | Music | Movies | & Cafe" is having a little shindig for our little lightening bolt scarred boy, Harry Potter. So a little FYI, kids:

Will he be there in person? [Don't be stupid.]
Will there at least be a reading? [sighs.]
Specialized "Harry Potter" atmosphere? [They had tables and chairs in Hogwarts, right? And I guess the Service Manager kinda looks like Haggart.]
Is it only for small children? [Are Harry Potter books only for kids? Yes, they are... but that doesn't stop older geeky people from reading... same applies here.]
Why should I go? [ 1) I'll be there 2) cake]
Can I dress up? [hehehe.]
What was the budget for this thing? [$20?]
When? Where? [11am, July 29, 2006, Border's - West Village / Uptown]

hehe. Jason totally knew about this too.

Borders Banter & BR Weekly

2006-07-25T21:15:00.000-05:00

Weekly BR = 57% (down from 60)

dammit!

Dude, so this guy totally burped in my face!! If I wasn't so awesome at customer service, I would of told him to FUCK OFF!

bastard.

It took all my concentration not to run away screaming. Seriously, that guy would see a doctor about that... and perhaps an ettiquette coach aswell.

funnies

2006-07-22T03:56:00.000-05:00

How hilarious is this? Click Link.

crazy funny made by Frank.

I'm so funny... and creative and talented. Or perhaps making fun of Xtina Aguilera is just that easy. No, I like the first explanation.

Borders Banter

2006-07-19T00:28:00.000-05:00

Transaction no.9801

Frank: Hiya! Did you find everything all right?
Guy: Yup, my son told me to get this magazine. He is in it.
Frank: Oh, that's cool. [whatever]

[He shows me the article]

Frank: Oh. You're Luke Wilson's dad. Cool. Do you have your Border's Reward Card?

[I signed him up]

BR weekly

2006-07-18T01:00:00.000-05:00

week3 = 60.1% (pimp status)
week2 = 58.4% (head above water status)
week1 = 38% (bus station skank status)

crazy week

2006-07-14T16:33:00.000-05:00

Next week. All week. Jason's brother and sister are living with us. Next week. All week.

Breathe Frank. Breathe.

This is exactly what it's gonna be like next week.

Yeah... David (Jason's EX) is coming too. I didn't have a picture of him, but Jason's Exes all look the same right? Wirey and odd. Anyways, you know Devon is going to resurface that weekend too. And for Jason's brother, I put Jason with Mark Swanson's hair.

I'm sure it won't be that bad... but they apparently are going to chain smoke in the apartment! eww!

Borders Banter

2006-07-13T21:17:00.000-05:00

Transaction No. 6518
Frank: Will this be all for you sir?
Guy: Uhh, yeah.
Wife: No, wait. I'm getting this People.
Guy: No, I'm not buying that!!!

Wife puts it on the counter.

Frank: ....
Frank waits for confirmation.

Guy: Meh, saying it out loud makes me feel better about myself.

BR

2006-07-10T01:36:00.000-05:00

Did I mention I hate Border's Rewards?

Click here

Retail

2006-07-10T00:51:00.000-05:00

Working in retail kinda blows. I mean, even if it's selling books.

So everyone at work an be clumped into three catagories: the young people, the work people and the super gays. Some are in more than one group, but mostly they lean into one main group. When they are segregated the system works. When interactions have to taken place, bad things can happen. Let me explain.

The Young People are everyone under 30. You would think that this applies to most of the people working in a book retail store, but no. There's only a handful of us.

The Work People are the person who are just way into their job... like too much!! And they are not just the upper-management people either. They do everything by the books, and don't take shortcuts to anything. They are annoying to everyone, but most importantly, they annoy me. They act as if Border's is like the Messiah returning to bring all the nerds/geeks/freaks from obsurity to the divine light of popularity... or something.

Then there's The Super Gays. Yeah, so if you didn't already know... like 74% of people working at Border's are TOTALLY GAY! Not just gay... but super gay. We are talking "Have you met my huuuusband!?" gay. How does everyone function when there's like 5 shrieking people running around you at all times? Oh man. And do they gossip?! Please, they know everything before you even say it. I think I heard someone in the back say "Steak It! UK!" before. Anyways, I try not to talk to these people too much... I don't wanna get sucked into their imaginary world.

So... yeah... all Border's employees have earphone radios.... And yes... it's exactly as much fun as it sounds. Here are just a few phrase I've heard over the walkie-talkie... some not by me.
1) Can someone please check me out?!
2) A lady just asked me "Do we sell books at this Border's."
3) Is that a girl or a boy?
4) Lane... someone just send you flowers.. sighs.
5) Yeah... a guy just went up the upstairs like 10 mintues ago looking for some books on poetry or something... Umm... I think she needs help.
6) Can I take my 10-minute break like at the end of my shift?
7) Do we sell book plates or something like that here? No, I think those were recalled in 1907.
8) Are you telling me that there are NO more copies of The Notebook in this entire store?!
9) Oh man, only 5 minutes till I'm outta here... 4 minutes... 3 minutes...
10) I get really nervous when the district manager is right there watching me... OH! Is he on here?!!

There is so much drama and scandalous things going on all the time. It's exactly like high school. Except with the hellish hours and humiliation in front of random strangers... strike that... definitly high school. At least I have a few friends who I wouldn't "rat out" to the bosses.

Then there's Border's Rewards... Let me just say... I hate Border's Rewards. It's just this promotion we are doing that everyone treats like SAT scores. So during each of our transactions... there is a 50% expectation that someone uses/signs up for the Border's Reward Card. It's a wonderful promo, but its a horrid way to "grade performance" as employees. My first week there I had a 38%... which is like at the bottom of the list. The superviser had "the talk" with me today only to find that an hour later when this week's BR (Border's Rewards) were posted, I had jumped to 58%.

I got bitched out for nothing!!! Damn you! Ugh.

How do people do this?

internet vampire

2006-07-05T12:30:00.001-05:00

So yeah.

The wireless internet router in the apartment decided not to work anymore, and I'm without internet! This sucks. And it is happening at the worst possible time too. My work schedule this week is very thin. I would of had time to use the internet more!!

Ugh. So how did I spend my July 4th dayoff? I wasn't on the internet! hehe. At least I started playing the Sims2 again. My poor sims were all neglected. Meh.

Anyways, if you were wondering, I'm leeching off of someone's unsecured network. Strike that, I know the name but it is too odd to mention. So it's called "Big Danny B." Seriously, why don't people just use the system default name like a normal person. I'm not complaining! So the only place in the apartment gets his very low signal to his network, so I'm stuck here in the middle of the dining/foyer room. But I suppose it could be worst... I'm on a table, so it's remotely sorta not uncomfortable. We'll see how long this sweet deal lasts.

Oh yeah, if you have an wireless internet router you want to donate/sell cheaply to a worthy cause...

Call me!

sighs

2006-06-30T00:52:00.000-05:00

There are days when you feel like everything is going your way. Times when you think the world was created just for you. You are carefree, happy and thoughtful. These are the things that make life great.

Then there are the times in your life when you realize that this isn't true. I mean, you are still carefree, happy and thoughtful... but you are doing this in a world that is less than perfect. A world that has huge flaws. The concept you once cherished and defended seems like a cesspool of negativity and political incorrectness. All the cognitive dissonance hits you while experiencing this discovery.

The world and its people are not just objects of amusement for you. They are the others who may think and act differently.

Every person has different experiences and attributes in the places and for ideals they encounter. But what some people know that others don't is that we all have to live in the same planet. We have to coexist. There is no other choice. So what do we do? Do we try and create our own little cultures within a culture? Try not to interact with persons who are inheritly different?

Well, it doesn't work like that. There are reasons why we don't like to mix and reasons why we shouldn't mix. But there is only one reason why we are mixing. That is because we live in the same fucking place.

So the only thing we can do while mixing is to be civil.

But obviously that is TOO much to ask these days.

If we have to coexist indifferently, then why not be separate? You stay in your delusion, and I'll stay in mine. Don't try and pull an outsider in just to reinforce your way to living versus theirs. It is a two-sided street, and the side that is more respectful always suffers.

It is not only enough to be different and separate for some people... those people want to be greedy and turn the world into what they want it to be. They infect everyone with their ways and make us believe that our dreamland ever existed, nor could even be possible. In their world, they are numerous and invincible. We no longer have autonomy. We are just cattle to them.

We become the very thing that we thought they were.

So who's delusional? Me or you?

new job

2006-06-26T21:04:00.000-05:00

I have a new job.

Today was my first day. My superviser is completely and utterly gay. I'm working more than 15 hours a week. I don't have sassy teenagers giving me the business. A "personal space" rule is in place. The staff celebrates diversity, not tries to control it. The sentence "I can't show my cross necklace cause it might offend someone" was stated.

I think I'm going to like it. That and I get 33% off everything.... and free promo crap!!! woot! I totally took 2 CDs and a book for free today!

interesting fact

2006-06-23T14:09:00.000-05:00

The Medrano family used to own the Arcadia Theaters. Luckily we sold it before it became a death trap.
My grandfather used to make all of his kids work there, so they would stay out of trouble. He screened only Spanish movies. Oh I can remember when my Dad used to go on and on about how he used to work there as a kid.
Bye, bye historical landmark.

Books

2006-06-20T20:00:00.000-05:00

Okay kids, I give you a mission. Frank needs to start reading more.

Today I was totally bored with all the internets! I know! So much like when people get excited over sending/receiving snail mail [like in the dark ages] rather than using email, I need to read actual books.

So here is where you gusy come in. What should the Frank read? I need a list of your "10 new books that Frank must read." Here's some criteria.

1) No autobiographies
2) No science fiction involving space aliens
3) No lesbian books
4) No books written or ghost-written by any of the Wayans brothers
5) The first 50 pages should be "amazingly awesome"
6) No books that could be adapted to an episode of Law and Order and/or CSI. All spinoffs apply.
7) Since I always judge books by their covers, they must be attractive.
8) If book was or is going to be a movie starring OR co-starring Robin Williams... no thanks.
9) No books about Accounting... Becky!!
10) Must be good.

Comment, phone, IM and tell me your suggestions! and GO!

teehee

2006-06-19T15:47:00.000-05:00

So it's in middle of the afternoon and I'm slowly realizing that I'm just a bum. ugh.

This is not my incredible life. I'm feeling just a little less than awesome, which for me is huge. I run some errands. I go to the bank; I go to Blockbuster; I go fill out some applications. I'm starving so I go to Target [closest to my apartment] for some impulse food items. Those damn Target people, soo crafty. I get some Diet Vanilla Dr Peppers, and I find some pizza rolls on sale.

The day was starting to look up.

I've been hearing about this Lifetime movie, so I look it up on the internets. It's on tonight. woot. What else am I going to watch on a Monday night? Then I notice that this other movie is on. I watch the movie.

Oh man, am I getting sucked into the Lifetime movie vaccum?! The movies are so completely outregeous. They not only show the obvious; they end with worst case scenerios. Filled with campy cheese and every mother's worst fears all at the same time!

The one I just watched is about a teen that is obsessed with internet porn. By the end of the movie you start to equate porn addiction and heroin use. The parents freak and want him to go to therapy. The teen gets beaten up by hooligans and tries to commit suicide. In the last scene he realizes that he does have a problem and runs home to hugs his mom.

...

LMAO!

Nothing is ever for free

2006-06-16T14:47:00.000-05:00

So yea, after I took a shower the other day I decided to comb my hair forward and was shocked by the hair. It was just over the tip of my nose. I went insane! I didn't really notice that my hair was getting that long. I mean, I knew it was shaggy but not like that. I guess my awesome hair styling skillz covered up the fact that I was turning into Cousin It.

Coincidentally my sister called me and ask if I was interested in getting a free haircut.

WOW. What luck!

There I was, thinking about getting a haircut, and what do ya know... a free haircut falls right into my lap. So I go there. It's a place in Addison called KnockOuts. It tailors to buisnessmen on the go who like sports and getting haircuts by sexly-dressed women with scissors. They offer you a beer as you walk in and then you can flirt with some random girl [that has three kids, but you would never know it!] for your lunchbreak. It's a real classy joint. The Sis is the receptionist.
When I get there, the Sis asks if she failed to mention that it's free cause they are breaking in a "new girl"... I think "you bitch!"

Now let me share something about my childhood and haircuts. I have hard hair to cut. I have lots of cowlicks and very thick hair. All of the people who have cut my hair have no problems telling me this fact. This is why I don't get haircuts too often... all the hair trauma.

And of course, this experience was destined to follow suit. This leads me to
"Things you Don't want to hear/see from someone who is cutting your hair:"
1) They don't teach you how to cut men's hair in school!
2) You hear a more experienced stylist whisper something into the ear of your stylist and then she gasps.
3) Stylist scratches her head.
4) Stylist asks you repeatedly "You're gonna hate me!"
5) she offers me another beer. [trying to get me drunk!!]
6) While the experienced stylist has started staring at what she is doing, she says "I totally get nervous when she does that"...

then I say "me too"

SHIZZNIT!

Anyways, afterwards I like it. I was surprised too. I really like it. I'm traumatized for life [again] but I like it.

whoa!

2006-06-13T16:51:00.000-05:00

Katharine McPhee's new single CD has finally leaked to the internets! I love it. Somewhere Over the Rainbow is amazing! Even My Destiny sounds sorta good. It's like a pop-country song.
Thank the heavens for this! My week isn't starting too good.

As of this moment, I'm still unemployed. I guess when they said they would call "next week" I half expected them to call Monday at 9am sharp. I'll be sweating bullets till then.

Anyways, here are the songs for you people who are too lazy to make a few clicks. This media player thingy is kinda neat. Look at me being all internet savvy!

Get your own Flash MP3 Player

Robot Frank!

2006-06-09T10:48:00.000-05:00

This past week has seriously been the week of "Fake Frank"... well maybe not totally fake but more "Nicely Packaged for the Masses Frank"

This week, I have gone on a total of four big interviews. Now, as you guys know, I don't usually do interviews well for various reasons such as

a) Appearance: I look like a hippie.
b) Speech: I studder under pressure.
c) Semantics: I'm one of those people who purposefully uses SAT words in interview banter... but it sounds like I just read it from the dictionary like 3 seconds before.
d) Conversation: I usually go off odd tangents, and when I catch myself doing this, I'm not all too subtle on trying to get back on topic.

But I have to say, these round of interviews went surprisingly great. I think it has to do with the fact that I have learned that I just cannot be myself at all. I have to be this separate entity that is floating above my body controlling every move that my physical body is making. It's like I'm the wizard behind the curtain.

Perhaps I should of went to "interviewing classes" or whatever because people tend to know this already. I've received numerous "duh, Frank" responses when I talk to people about my new revelation.

I'm like a Robot on interviews now.

But it takes more than just being a robot of course. I can't be all "I-am-Frank! Compute!" I have to be a robot that is like trying to be human... like artificial intelligence. I have to be Hailey Joel Osment, but like a grown up looking for employment. I have to be fake, but life-like.

Anyways, I'm finally all done interviewing for Carrollton-Farmers Branch and I'm hopeful. Out of the four interviews, three went fabulously. The first one doesn't count, right? It's not like it went horrible... but during the interview.. I just didn't feel like I really want that job... and by the end of it.. I completely knew that I didn't want it. If they were to call me back, I would tell them I would think about it and wait for better offers.

Yeah, so CFBISD works efficiently [as do all district, so I'm told] All the applications are sent to personnel. Personnel sends applications to schools in need. Schools interview applicants. School sends reccommendations to personnel. Personnel calls to offer job to applicant.

Now, at least my first "crappy job" interview wasn't for CFBISD. It was a private school. SWEET! So all my good interviews for the jobs I liked came from the same place! But let's look at those three jobs closer:

Job #1
PROS: It is the grade level [elementary] I wanted, I met the teacher I'm working with and she's cool, it's a job where they actually need me, the school is pretty, and has a diverse student body.
CONS: It's far away!! I think I can get there everyday, but it's not going to be an easy thing.

Job#2
PROS: It's the grade level I wanted, locale is excellent, I know I would never be bored in this job, interview went brillantly, loved history of school.
CONS: It's an alternative school, school looks ugly, [although I do like working with kids with behavioral problems] it is a WHOLE school filled with them!! I like a school with diversity.

Job#3
PROS: school's pretty, good locale, diverse student body, excellent interview, Kids that need me, met the teacher I'd be paired with.
CONS: It's for middle school.

It's hard to decide which one I like the most. I guess I don't want to decide, because you never know which job you might actually get. I want to start one of these jobs with an open mind and a positive outlook.

I'm sooo excited. Wish me luck!

Inside the Bachelor's Life

2006-06-06T13:51:00.000-05:00

If you've been inside my apartment, you knew this was coming eventually...

Let's see one part of the apartment, the kitchen. Observe:

A: The cabinet that never completely closes. and YES, if you look closely that is my dinner you see. The Macaroni and Cheese.
B: Various bills and credit card statements.. like we do.
C: The only pots/pans we have are dirty and on the stove
D: Jason's fryer.. we used once and never used again because we couldn't figure out how to clean it. Yeah. the orginal grease is still in there. Beware, don't open it!
E: Misson Tortilla chips that have been there for at least a year. I'm sure of it.
F: Miscellaneous stains on the counter... let's hope it's syrup.
G: Deliver/carryout and other packages everywhere!

you know there's more!

H: Unclean! Unclean!
I: At least we drink clean water, right?
J: tequila shots anyone?
K: Martini glass, like I do.
L: Plugged applicance by the sink... yeah.
M: My sister came to the apartment last week and totally started doing the dishes!! This is what is left of the clean dishes. When is she coming back?! I wonder if she does windows too?
N: A sad attempt on keeping the smell controlled.

Wow... I never thought I would turn into one of those people who didn't clean after themselves. Seriously! This is probably getting out of hand. The funny thing is that looking at the living room, it's like night and day.

Will it Ever End?!

2006-06-04T05:30:00.000-05:00

Bring it On: All or Nothing...

Bring it on part 3?! This cannot be happening. And it has Beyonce's little sister, Solange in it too. It's too perfect! Didn't she like have a baby not too long ago?

We're going to have to make it a Bring It On party when it comes out on Dvd [as you know it will!] I'll have to make some strong-assed drinks to go with it. Cause I don't think I'm ready for this ~~jelly~~ movie.

Future movie title ideas:
Bring It On: Bitch, I already told you three times!
Bring It On: Don't be hatin'
Bring It On: Tonya Hardin style!
Bring It On: Britney versus Christina, the final showdown
Bring It On: My baby needs diapers
Bring It On: Murder Mysteries
Bring It On: Nomi pushed me down the stairs and took my lead in the Las Vegas show, Goddess!!

Travels

2006-06-01T21:07:00.000-05:00

Oh man, so the Dart Rail is like the awesomest thing ever!

It's so efficient and fast.

zip! zip! zip!

Plano is not so sexy. It's highlights include The Dr Pepper factory, the Frito-Lay factory, the JC Penny factory and let's not forget SMU-in-Legacy (re:The nerd factory).

Yeah, so I have a job interview there. I could be working in Plano. COULD being the operative word. And no, not at the Dr Pepper factory [although I could put a glove on a Dr Pepper bottle and wave at it while it makes it way through the assembly line. teehee] It's at an Elementary school.