Wednesday, April 20, 2005

so close.

I am so close to finishing school! SOO CLOSE! Why can't I be there now?

Anyways, things are in overdrive for me academically. I have so many assignments and studying I should be doing but I'm not. I'm not doing it yet cause I know if I procrastinate it enough... when I do start it.... it will be fast and painless. sweet.

But there is a little joy left of my college life. There's going to be an awesome party at Monica's on Saturday. It is going to be sweet. You know why? Cause I'm getting trashed! Something I won't be able to do when I grow up and get a job... ugh. Which reminds me... I'll collecting money for 'stuff'. You know who you are. You people who just come to the party last minute and drink everything! Arghhh! I'm so drunk with authority.

So in my CTV class today we watch an episode of Passions. and OMG! I think after a whole semester of watching soap operas, I'm finally getting why people like this crap! It's good! oh shit! I'm going straight to hell. So we watch it and it has 3 basic storylines... I like describing!

Love Triangle: So there's a stupid idiot guy who has to choose between the girl he married and the his baby's momma. He can't have both. He needs to choose!! and NOW! So the two girls explain there reasons why he should choose her. Gwen, the wife, is all like 'we're married!' and 'that other girl is evil! She stole my fetuses!' and 'remember that time when she dress up as me in a blonde wig and tried to have sex with you?!' And Teresa (baby's momma) is all like 'Do you want your child to grow up without a dad like you did?!' and 'you even told me you loved me and that you only married Gwen cause she was pregnant... and now she isn't!' "Thanks to you, Teresa!! You stole my embryos!!" replies Gwen. CRAZINESS! Anyways, he finally chooses Gwen because He took vows under God... of course that didn't stop him from knocking Teresa up!

Troubled Teen: So the teen girl is all trying to rebel against her Cop father by going out with a Night Club owner named Spike... did I mention that she tatooed his name on her thigh?! Anyways, the dad is all 'I'm gonna get that man behind bars!'. Meanwhile the stepmom can't to anything cause apparently the teen girl is all like 'If you tell my dad anything, he'll call my mom and she'll come back and then eventually her and my dad will get back together!!' The stepmom is like 'GASP!' So the teen ends up sneaking out of the house and the stepmom has to lie for her. So in the nightclub, the teen is starting to realize that maybe she is in over her head with dating Spike... as he takes her to his backroom/bedroom.

I'm his mother!: Beth, a crazy lady who stole a couple's baby at birth, has just took a DNA test and is waiting for the results. Only she knows that she stole that baby! So now she's hysterial talking to her mother who is obviously 'doing the voices'. Beth is all like 'Maybe I can get fake passports off of teh internet!' She goes to the computer and starts typing vigorously. heh. The mother's all like 'You stole their baby! Run away now!' Then Beth says 'I'll kill the birth mom!! If I can't have her, she won't either!' The mom shakes crazily around the room explaining how Precious (a nurse that helped the mom which is also an orangutan!... seriously!) has all the brains and could solve everything. Beth is all like 'once I kill the birth mother the birth father will understand me and then we'll start dating!!!' Beth's mom tries to explain how there was like 17 things wrong with her logic. Then Beth's all 'I gotta get those passports!!' then she goes back to the computer again.
MEANWHILE the real parents are in a park arguing about the situation. The mom has absolutely no reasoning behind her suspisions about the baby, cept the feeling she got when she held him and breast feed him...
YEAH! Beth, mysteriously couldn't breast feed your own supposed baby, so ironically the birth mom did!!! The husband says 'that happens all the time'

Oh man... Daytime Soaps are so twisted. Which is why I'll probably start watching Passions. Out of all the soaps to watch.. Passions is the most 'out there' ones. This particular episode didn't have the usual fantasy that Passions is known for like the Witch named Tabetha, zombies, a doll that turns into a little person, and Precious the nurse orangutan that just when back to Africa with her family.

Stupid Professor Griffin!

BUT we did get our very first straight guy response today! When asked why should the guy choose Teresa instead of Gwen, he replied "Cause Teresa is hotter!"... I think everyone in the class turned their heads and looked at him and thought 'What the hell are you doing here? This is a Soap Opera class, you fool!'

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