Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Unwritten Friend Duties

There are many functions for friends. Things that friends have to do without much question. It's like some unwritten rule or something. It's up there with staring at fake boobs... you may be a straight women and/or gay man, but you're gonna stare at fake boobs when ya see them. Anyways, where was I? Oh! Functions! Here they are (in no particular order):

1)Moving: a friend is expected to help with the moving process.
example- Jason: I'm moving in my sisters stuff. Frank: What time to ya want me to come over to help?

2)Consulting: a friend is expected to consult/counsel.
example- Jason is having some relationship troubles, so Frank hits him over the head with a blunt object... therefore curing his woes. OR Jason tells Frank that his ass looks fat this those jeans!

3)Mutual Inclusive Outings: a friend is expected to accompany the other to places.
example- Frank and Jason are dancing in a local disco. They are not checking out the eye candy... maybe just a little.

4)No Judgements: a friend is expected to not judge... no matter how stupid or slutty the other may be.
example- that's way too easy. Use your imagination.

5)Metamorphisize: friends slowly become eachother.
example- Jason says "yo"... Frank says "yo"

That's all I got now.. there's like a million of them. I used Jason for every example cause it's easy. and... Devon would be way more offensive.

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