Thursday, April 27, 2006

Reality TV Overload.

Reality TV is draining all humanity and culture...

but it's sooo good!

It's been a very exciting week for Reality TV. All my favorites are getting very good. And by very good, I mean totally and completely insane! Real Reality television is all about unlikely situations with alot of odd people all put together in an intricate tapistry of awkwardness that would make a normal person cringe and presume the fetal position.
Oh yea. goodtimes.

Anyways, now is the time to cue the So You've Had a Bad Day anthem to talk trash about the losers of Reality TV this week. [hehe, as if there's winners. REALLY GOOD reality TV has NO winners. Only the delusional ones.]

American Idol
Not only did the McPheever live to see another week, Katharine McPhee was announced as one of the Top 2 according to votes Tuesday night! Isn't that exciting?! All my power dialing helped! woot.
But there has to be a loser, and it wasn't Paris like I [and dialIdol] predicted. It was Kellie Pickler, the country-singing calamari-virgin that was a frontrunner when the show started. At first I was shocked that my prediction was wrong, but good riddence to the Pick. I guess I thought she would always be around cause I hated her so much. You know when you lose your nemesis... you have no purpose in life. Who am I going to hate now?! I guess I can hate Taylor Hicks, but that's like hating someone with a mental disability, right?! He's like old and spastic. That's has to be terminal. Some people call it 'soul', I call it epileptic seisures. Everytime he sings I want to yell "Give him his pills!! Dear God who has this man's pills?! Can't you see that he needs his pills?!!!"
Oh man, American Idol is so great this season.

America's Next Top Model
ANTM doesn't have seasons, they have cycles. How appropriate. Referring to a show's seasons that include an all woman cast [and gay men, but same thing] as cycles. That is sooo fitting. [And just in case you are insanely socially awkward or JASON, I'm refering to menstral cycles.] Why don't they just call it 'seasons' seriously. It just gives men chance to theorize about the double entendre.
So Nnenna gets the boot, and for good reasons!

Oh my! Nnenna looks like a clown in every one of her modeling shots. So the princess-snob may have perfect linguistical skills, an actual African lineage, is a chemist and wants to spread peace, love and moodrings to all the little children of the world...
but she's a huge bitch! and since you forgot, this is America's Next Top Model! Not America's Next Top Girl with great resume creditials!!
Nnenna the clown is dead to me.
[The roommate cried in his room for the whole day cause his favorite girl got the boot. "Oh My! She had 4 Ns in her name!! That's awesome" as he would say... and I'm paraphasing cause I can't fake the level of nerdiness that is Jason.]

The Apprentice
I remember hearing about this show the first couple of seasons it aired and I was like "It's so lame... 'Hi, I'm Donald Trump.. hehe... You're Fired!"
But it is actually an entertaining show. At least this season is. But I'm sad to say that my favored contestant Andrea got fired this week!
This show is about buisness [I suppose] so naturally I rooted for the evilest one.

She was right all the time, and everyone else was wrong. It was so true. They all hated her awesome skills!! Damn them! Sure she's already successful in her own rite and therefore doesn't need it as much as the other [re: losers], but she is totally the best devil, I mean woman for the job!
She won when she was project manager and she won good! Those other biatches are just jealous!

Now I'm going to have that Daniel Powter song in my head forever. thanks.

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