Monday, December 19, 2005

Memoirs of a Brokeback Stone

meh, I was trying to find a clever way of putting the movies, Memoirs of a Geisha, Brokeback Mountain and The Family Stone together for a fun title. Didn't work out. Other finalists were: Stone of a Mountain, Brokeback Geisha Family, and like using Geisha as a phonetic for 'gay'... I'm so uncreative. Anyways look at all the movies I saw last weekend.
I said I was going to watch all the movies in one weekend even if it killed me. And as neurotic as it sounds, it was rather difficult! seriously, yo.

Brokeback Mountain
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I've been waiting for this movie to come out for like a year. I read the book. I was patient. And now it's finally out and I get to see it! I knew this weekend was going to be hectic trying to squeeze 3 movies in like 2 days, but I was determined. So I went to the earliest show at the Magnolia, 11:15pm Friday. What else am I going to do? It's normally my sleeping time before work.
Turns out this showing we like the first time they showed Brokeback to paying customers in all of Dallas. There was a speech from the manager and everything. Every seat was taken in the theater. I've never seen so many incredibley old gay people before. DAAAMN! Don't these people have jobs?!
Anyways, after the opening credits and the words "Brokeback Mountain" flashing across the screen I was like already on the verge of tears. Wow... I'm going to be the hugest pussy ever, right? Well at least I'm in a room full of people who are gayer than Tom Cruise. No need to hold back, eh?
I was satisfied with the movie. And I think that's saying alot coming from me. Movies are never better or as good as the book. But I think that it managed to get 2 hours and 15 minutes from a less than 50 page book. That alone is impressive. So here are reasons to watch this movie:
  • Heath Ledger is actually a good actor... WHAT?! This is the same guy that was in that stupid Camelot spoof movie?!

  • Oh man... Jake Gyllenhaal is gay. No doubt about it. You can't act that gay ever.

  • It's not a gay porno. Tastefully done... perhaps the first "sex scene" is shocking and unexpected. I mean... how can you get from being a rodeo cowboy cookin' beans and roping things in one scene, then an agressive love scene a matter of minutes. I suppose it's a werid film major thing. whateva.

  • Even though this is a story about two men falling in love, there's something for the straight men in the audience. Topless Michelle Williams and Anne Halfaway.

  • There's a realistic SMU reference! I can't explain... just go see the movie.

The Family Stone
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OMG! When going to see this movie, I just thought it was going to be a feel good chick flick movie... you learn a valuable lesson or some crap at the end. But no. Here is all you need to know about this movie.
  • Sarah Jessica Parker is the devil.

  • Contrary to popular belief (Devon and I) Claire Danes is actually in this movie. Who knew. I guess Jason wasn't just crazy as usual.

  • If you're gay, in an interracial relationship, hearing impaired, get scared by the sight of Diane Keaton easily, wanted to see Rachel McAdams being a plastic via Mean Girls, or hate seeing Luke Wilson being creepy... you'll totally get offended and hate this movie. hehe.

I don't even know what to think about this movie. It had some really good and funny moments. But does it 'make up for the bad ones?' I dunno.

Memoirs of a Geisha
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This movie... even before I saw it had everything going against it. I had a horrible hangover from the night before (whiskey and I are not on speaking terms for a while!). I went to see it at Cityplace where they spelled Memoirs without the second 'm' on the huge electric light billboard facing I-75. The theater also has a reputation for having crappy sound, which it did! There was nothing much old, psuedo-intellectual people in the audience making usage errors with the word "faux pas." And I was freezing... probably from the hangover.


I love the movie anyways!! SOOO GOOD!
that's all I have to say about that.

See my new desk chair!!! Xmas came early for Frank!

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